Deborah Tannen - Difference Theory

6 contrasts:

• Status vs Support
• Independence vs Intimacy
• Advice vs Understanding
• Orders vs Proposals
• Conflict vs Compromise

Status vs Support:
Competitive conversation- men seek to achieve the upper hand in conversations, or prevent others from dominating them. (Banter)


Independence vs Intimacy:
Women are concerned with closeness and support of others.
Men are concerned with being independent and dominant.


Advice vs Understanding:
Tannen claims that men take a complaint as a challenge to find a solution to the problem. Where as women will try to understand the complaint and how the person is feeling.


Information vs Feelings:
Men share information, women share feelings.


Orders vs Proposals:
Women make suggestions, men use direct imperative.


Conflict vs Compromise:
Women are "trying to prevent fights" says Professor Tannen.
Occupational lexis.


Tannen states that the male is used as a norm. For example, common terms like "mankind" and "history".


Tannen says "Denying real differences can only compound the confusion that is already widespread in this era of shifting and reforming relationships between men and women."


Dale Spender: Women who speak like men are considered unfeminine, rude or bitchy.




High involvement speakers: concerned to show enthusiastic support (even if it means simultaneous speech). Often interpreted as rude.


High considerate speakers: concerned with being considerate to others, considered polite.